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Are Internet friends really worth it?

Discussion in 'Perspectives' started by Lastier, Jun 3, 2007.

  1. Lastier

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    I am beginning to doubt online friendships in general.

    In the end when those people, you communicate with, don't come from the same city or at least country, you will never have the chance to see or met them. Isn't it really a big waste of time to invest the effort into them? Yeah, you will sure have a good time with them. The time will generally pass by faster but in the end the contact will break up after a few months or years, you will most likely never hear from them again and then you will ask yourself was it really worth the time to concentrate on them?

    Don't get me wrong, I also have online friends, but this thought just passed my mind and I would like to hear more opinions from other people about it.
     
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  2. impersonal

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    I wouldn't call a friend anyone I've met over the Internet. Acquaintances, perhaps. But they are not people I count on. I don't think you can be friends with someone before you meet that person in life. (If you meet someone on the Internet, then in real life, then this person can be a friend...)

    That doesn't mean it's necessarily "not worth it". It's good to have people to play online games with, or "correspondents" who tell you about their lives. If, as you say, "you have a good time with them", then your time wasn't wasted, right? I just think it's better to not get too much involved emotionally.
     
  3. Valentine ♥

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    I've met quite a few people from the internet and we've met in real life. They were exactly the same as they were online...

    Call me lucky, but that's the reason why I don't mind internet relationships - mine always work out.

    But I don't see it as a waste of time on your part. Friends are friends, and if you truly honor your friendship with someone, it doesn't matter if it's online or offline.
     
  4. x-airashii-x

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    No, because these people are real people and it's not like you're talking to a computer programme is it? Therefore you're not wasting your time.
    What's myspace for then? It's for meeting new people as well as keeping in contact with current friends.
     
  5. Jayka

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    Yeah, I think internet friends can be worth your time.
    When I was having a hard time on school, it was one of my friends on internet who pulled me through. I lost contact with him afterwards, but I was glad he was there for me at that time.

    I've gain and lost internet-friends. But there are two guys whom I'm still in contact with after 4 and 3.5 years respectively. I think its easier to open yourself on the internet (for me it is) so we know each other very well. One of them I met in reallife and sometimes we hang out. And the other one (the one I know for 4 years) I never even met. Yet I consider him a very good friend. And even if I will lose contact with (either of) them, I'm glad I used to know them.

    It's true that internet-friends can easily go and you could wonder if they were really worth your time. Yet sometimes it could work out :)
     
  6. Citan

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    yeah its worth it. whenever im in canada i have a free place to stay and somebody to hang out with.
    edit: im really close to a few of my friends and they never sign on to msn so we just exchange cell #'s and keep in touch that way. i suggest you do the same if you like your friend enough :)
     
  7. TigerTwista

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    Yea I say it is worth it, there are quite a few online friends that I've been in touch with for a good few years ^_^ granted there were times that I had lost contact with them but we just turn around and catch up with each other again so its all good ^_^
     
  8. i luv blue

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    i dont know.maybe not maybe so.but it's fun to talk to people ont he internet.i talk to people from different states.
     
  9. Near

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    I just find it hard to make an actual connection with someone who I have never meet physically. I generally do not invest a lot into them, but that doesn't mean I don't respect that person or whatever. If we do meet though it instantly becomes a different relationship...
     
  10. Uchiha Obito ♥

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    I agree. I've made many Inernet friends over the past 2 years I've actually been on the Internet, and even though I may not know some of them in real life, I enjoyed meeting those people.
     
  11. AbnormallyNormal

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    well you can perhaps meet them by going long distance or something, you never know when you might move closer together somehow. besides if you are online an awful lot an online friendship is still rewarding
     
  12. Esponer

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    So, you may not be able to meet them. What, precisely, do you do to an acquaintance upon meeting them that without the ability to do an acquaintance could not possibly be a friend? Presumably a friendship need not be consummated by coitus, or feeling their leg, or slapping them across the face, so what precisely is required in physically meeting someone for them to be your friend? Why must you meet them?

    Friendships are intellectual phenomena, and online is a sufficient medium for the conveyance of it. And if acquaintances online are not worth your time as friends, then that argument must necessarily conclude that friends in general are not worth your time.

    As for friendships ending after a time, this is true of all friendships, and frankly I've had a far greater percentage of my friendships online lasting more than say, three years, than friendships in person. At this moment, I have at least ten long-standing friends who I've never met who I've spoken to in the last week, who I keep up with regularly, and who I've known for many years.

    Friends in this town? I'm back in my hometown for the summer, and I wanted to get in touch with some of my friends. Not one. I don't have their details anymore. Phone numbers change, addresses change, and not one of the local friends I had a year ago can I even talk to anymore. No, real life friendships are bestowed with no special ability to last longer.

    My best friendships have been online. Some have resulted in meeting up in person (actually, by "some" I mean the ones which I wanted to upgrade into a form with coitus), and they've mostly gone well. I have online friends I can trust, and have trusted, and can confide in.
     
  13. Glittercunt

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    Internet friends aren't really a friend; in fact, it shouldn't even be considered an acquaintance...
     
  14. Double Arts Sui

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    I have a lousy temper in real life, which is not easily seen online. As a result, the best people I ever met were online friends. People I've met and talked to last year and with which I maintain contact. I have a friend which I have known for 8 years and then met him - fantastic. Another one for five years, and the same happened. Different cultures, yes, but he was as he said he was.

    While the real people in my own country (I can't call them friends, not even acquaintances: people I met around while studying and that I had to be with for a title's sake) hardly ever call me or worry about me, or even ask me to go out and have a cuppa coffee. Living in the same city as they do.

    I really cared for them and wished them to become a group I could fit into, but their commitment was superficial, even more than the online stuff. I have online friends who actually are worried if I don't get into the web for a while and phone me home from abroad... I do not trust my fellow countrymen online, real life was not to be an exception.

    My choice has been keeping online friends, and ditching all the others, obviously the 'real' people are not worth my time or worry, and cannot be called friends at all. It might have to do with my country and the people living in it, or, as I said, my lousy temper: I fit in with foreign people just nicely, either online or on real life.
     
  15. Near

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    That's quite an assumption. I think your leaving out a lot of aspects that go towards friendship, because it's not just purely communication. If you believe each person is an individual than how can ignoring a large aspect of their being not limit the friendship?
     
  16. Sonis

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    I would consider them real friends and worth the time. There are three friends I have made through the internet that I have known for almost two years. Each of them are great people and I consider them in the same circle as any of my normal friends. On the other hand there are peopel I talk to through the internet that I don't really consider much at all. For me it is the same in my normal life. There are those who are close to me and there are those who aren't. Just because you may never get to meet them face to face doesn't mean you can't still have the same kind of close connection.
     
  17. Esponer

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    What am I leaving out? I'm not see any large aspects not included save for decidedly coitussy ones.
     
  18. Marl

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    They're worth as much as the friends you know in real life, if you ask me. Like in real life, you've got friends, and you've got friends. The people you're happy to hang out with now and then, share a laugh and a beer or two with, and then there are the friends you'd die for.

    The friendship isn't any less "real" or "important" if you don't meet them. Unless you base your friends solely on physical aspects?
     
  19. Caitlyn Jenner

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    i make internet friends all the time.

    But i dont get attached to them.No bitch i am
     
  20. Yes there very much are worth it....
     
  21. GrimaH

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    It's all up to the person himself to decide.
     
  22. Voynich

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    I think they are worth it. They're just as precious to me as my offline friends. When you invest time in an offline friend, you don't know if it will be worth it either. They might screw you over, move away or simply stop talking to you after a while. Very few friendships actually last a lifetime. I've had friends stop talking to me for no reason after 10 years of friendship.

    Problem with offline friends is that they are usually so intwined in your life that when things do go wrong, it usually ends up in fights, gossip and people taking sides. With online friends, not so much. You can just avoid them and block them.

    Your reasoning makes putting effort in friendships worthless, just because they will leave. I'd rather put effort in friendship with the hope that they might stay around. Still has a higher percentage of succes than your method I think.
     
  23. Shade Luka

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    Friends are friends no matter where they come from. I think they are worth it.
     
  24. drache

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    Even one we meet has something to offer, something to show, something we can learn from; and to me friendship is not I see someone x number of times per day, per week, per month or even x times in the course of my life. So I think it is worth it if you truely find a friend over the internet.
     
  25. TreeofSephri

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    A friend is a friend regardless of the communication medium. Don't just abandon friendships because you believe you may never see that person. Sometimes it good to just have someone to talk to.
     
  26. Pilaf

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    "This word...you keep using it. I don't think it means what you think it means."
     
  27. Near

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    ....I don't have time to list them.

    I guess you think the mind is the only important aspect when it comes to friendship because you can transfer ideas. The criteria you use to exclude things conveniently skips the mind. Well what exactly does the mind have that so damn important? 90% of most things communicated are bullshit anyways, yet it has an impact. So how can you really say that "only the intellect is important" when clear the same amount of physical redundant aspects can affect you as well.

    Could you really develop the same relationship with someone who you never meet vs someone you interact on a daily bases? be honest.
     
  28. Key

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    the thread should've been is internet friends really count as A REAL ??FRIEND??
     
  29. Juanita Tequila

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    I had a few internet friends, they were really cool people, but as time passed, we lost connection.
     
  30. Giovanni Rild

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    I don't know the meaning of the word. I only had two true friends in my life, both moved away.

    A friend is a friend. When people use the Serious Business excuse, they are really saying "I'm a asshole and you have to take my shit or you will be called emo(like being emotional is a bad thing) and be shunned".

    When you speak to someone, you are not speaking to them, you are speaking to their mask, their farce, what they want you to see. The internet can make this living lie easier to accomplish.

    I made a choice, to show my true emotions wherever I go, even the internet. My true face may be a unsightly one, but it's the true me.
     
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