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Broken Confessions~A flower in the snow

Discussion in 'Naruto Fanworks' started by InoSakuShine, Oct 8, 2006.

  1. InoSakuShine

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    >>they arent all going to be SasuSaku)


    Part 1: A Flower in the Snow // SasuSaku



    There he was. Waiting for her. Just like she asked. This was her chance, she thought. She had to tell him how she felt.
    Sakura felt her cheeks burning red. He noticed her. He was staring. He looked so cool, just waiting by the tree. She approached him.
    "Hey.." she said.
    He nodded and then looked at her. As if to say, "What?"
    "Sasuke I....I want you to really know.." She tried to look into his eyes, but she was afraid of the rejection. Of the cold.
    "Sakura." he cut her short. "I'm not interested."
    The girls eyes wavered for an instant.

    He thought she was going to cry.That wasn't uncommon, but she didn't know that he felt sorry. He almost wished he could say, "I'm sorry. I can't be with you." Why? Why didn't she understand. He can't return her feelings. Why did she have to be a distaction. She didn't truly know him. No one did. But then again....didn't she come closest?
    And these thoughts and feelings he hated. She made him think like that. He looked down at her, expecting tears. Tears that he would pretend meant nothing to him.
    But Sakura wasn't going to cave. She decided ever since that day in the Forest of Death when she cut her hair, she really cut her weakness. She would not cave. Tears didn't spill from her eyes, they merely wavered for a second, and stopped. her eyes were hard and aggressive. Why wouldn't he understand? She loved him, and she wasn't going to just stop, or cave. Why....why was he so cold? She knew...there just had to be something else there.

    And did anyone know that Sasuke wasn't so indestructable as everyone would have like to believe? he guessed he fooled everyone, and he tried his hardest to fool himself, too. No one really knew what he was thinking, or going on inside him. Everyone saw the cold.
    But Sakura, maybe she couldn't see the warmth, but she searched for it. She never gave up hope. She insisted on wearing a short dress in the harsh winter.
    She bit her lip and grabbed his shoulders, fighting hard to hold back tears. She shook him.
    "Don't you see?" she asked. "I'm not letting you go! I have no intention of letting you go!" She just hoped her voice wasn't cracking. "Can't you see?" She said, and grabbed her short pink hair in her fist.Her eyes cried, "See what I did for you!" His eyes.....were emotionless.

    He detached himself from her. He couldn't respond. It was beyond him. She walked away. You think. You think she would be done by now, fed up. But once you love someone, you don't just stop loving them. Do you think, "Sasuke is such a jerk?" Well, you. You don't understand. Sakura deos. Sakura understands. And she will try again later.

    ``````````````````````
    this is my 2nd fic my first was a disaster I hope this is better tell me what you think. Flame it if you like because I dont want to continue if its really bad.
     
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  2. Believe It!

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    Good premise. Interesting writting style. I am sure it will also appeal to Sakura fans. I am not one, nor have I given much thought to the depths of her character, but it seems that you have, and the way you present it does draw my interest. Good start. Believe it!
     
  3. InoSakuShine

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    Thanks a lot!! I really analyze SasuSaku as a relashonship and I really tried to acquire a tone that speaks to the audience about that relashonship so producing this. Thanks for your comment.
     
  4. Kouu Koigokoro

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    It's really good. I'm not a really a fan of SasuSaku so it's got to be awesome.
     
  5. Sorrow-Tear's Champion

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    Interesting take on Sakura, good start.
     
  6. Angel Haiku

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    Your off to a good start!It's a real good fic so far!Im not a big fan of SasuSaku but this is changing my mind on the pairing!It's great and I am enjoying it!So I look forward to this story!
     
  7. InoSakuShine

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    Thanks so much!!!

    Its how I view her normally, really. Thanks!

    Thanks!!!!! That means a lot that Im actually changing your mind!! I love SasuSaku and I think this conveys why,

    You guys are making me nervous. Well my updates are coming soon so wait up!!!
     
  8. InoSakuShine

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    Fighting for Hope

    Part 2 Fighting for Hope

    Stiff up against the wall. Slowly, peek around the corner. A splash of pink hair he spies and whips back around. His cheeks warm up to the same color as the rose he is twindling idly in his bandaged hands. No, it is not Sasuke. It is Rock Lee, hesistating to approach, once again, Sakura Haruno.

    Why is he hesitating? He is in no way pessismistic. In fact, he is not so niave as everyone thinks. He's the best, and he knows it. Besides, in the end, isn't it the underdog who gets the girl?
    in the end, isn't it the loser who wins? "But no!" Lee thinks. "I am not a loser! But none the less, I will get the girl! Sorry Naruto, sorry Sasuke!" The real reason he is hesitating is because maybe this isn't the best time. Sakura haruno has just stalked about from Sasuke Uchiha.

    "Lee?" Her voice questions, and he jumps, caught by surprise. At first she gives him a look, that clearly states, "I-do-not-wish-to-deal-with-you-at-this-time!" but quickly her eyes soften. In the present she was always the careful to give him time of day. He had proved himself more than worthy to
    talk to her, didn't he?

    "Sa-sakura!" She eyed the rose in his hands. "This, is for you." He presents her with the flower, but that's about all he thinks he can do right now.
    "Thanks, Lee." She said. She knew how it felt to be rejected. "Thanks, alot. Well....see you some other time." He watched her go away. No matter how much she turned him down, no matter how subtley, either, he would not give up. In many ways he and Sakura were just alike, he relized, to his dismay.

    They both held undying love for someone, and if Sakura truly was similar to him, he thought,, she would not let Sasuke go. Ever. But neither will he. In the end, Lee thought. Somebody's got to give.
    "And it won't be me!" He says aloud.
     
  9. Kouu Koigokoro

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    Ah, very awesome! Can't wait for the next chapter.:nod
     
  10. InoSakuShine

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    Thanks, that will probably be tomorow.
     
  11. Kouu Koigokoro

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    Do you just write that fast or already have them planned out?
     
  12. InoSakuShine

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    The Thorns of a Rose

    The Thorns of a Rose


    Today again he is thinking about all the pain he is going through. His mind is in a twisted torment. He is on edge, and deosn't know what to do. Time is running out. Everyday day is a day wasted that Sasuke deos not kill Itachi. And why? Why is Naruto growing stronger, even more stronger than him? Why was he able to save Sakura when he couldn't? Sakura. . . . He can't handle these stupid complications.
    Sakura admires him so much but he couldn't even save her. Nevermind that. He must focus. Focus on revenge. Some say love just gets in the way of action. They say its not about who hooks up with who in the end. So there.
    But..


    Naruto is laying in his bed. All sprawled out. It is raining hard out....or is it snowing? He can't see, because the window is fogged up. He sits and thinks, and lets his mind wander to everything.His nail clicks agaist his forehead protecter. He thinks about Kakashi-sensei's mask. He thinks about the tracker ninja's masks.What's under them, anyhow? He's never seen someone with a mask take it off. Did they even have faces? Then he remebers Haku.
    Haku. He remembers him. That boy that was forced into a world of lost purposes.
    "What's worse?" He wonders aloud. "To live for and only fixed on one purposs that destroys you..." Like Haku.. "Or to not have one at all?" But the purposs Haku had acquired was at least decent. Haku was so strong. And Naruto remembers that day in the forest.
    Haku said you become stronger when you protect something you love. Someone thats precious to you. I think....Naruto thought....I think thats the only way to truly become strong...
    The rain beats hard on the windowsill. Yet it is soft....like snow?
    "Haku....?" Naruto says. Love is powerful. Maybe love is strength. Deosn't at least, everything thrive from the feeling you have for something else. Even anger. Even vengeance is spawned from one original feeling: The like, or love. If someone you love dies, deosn't that create anger? Is it posssible to love yourself and thrive from that? Like it or not, love and romance is always apart of a good story. of life.
    It may not matter who ends up with who at the end. But it matters how you got to the end. For that is the story. And thank anything that helped you get there. In the end that may be what you remember. Maybe that is what truly matters. Not life. Not what you did in it. But how you lived it.
     
  13. InoSakuShine

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    Both. Ill write one fast. Then Ill wait like a day or a couple hours before I post it. Now ive got to go write more..!!
     
  14. InoSakuShine

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    IS anyone going to rread this? I see really retartded fics out here that havae more responses than mine and I dont think mine is not interestion or bad....or is it?
     
  15. Kouu Koigokoro

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    Oh, awesome! Geez, I wish I could come up with some ideas.
     
  16. InoSakuShine

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    :) next update tommorow. Thanks, Kouu Koigokora.
     
  17. chishio-kun

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    Cool! GOOD work! Impressive!
     
  18. InoSakuShine

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    Thanks!! Even though that sounds a lot like sarcasm lol!
     
  19. Kouu Koigokoro

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    Ah, I'll always be here to read the ficcies. Hopefully.:)
     
  20. Tanaka Ichiro

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    Update suppose to be today.... hello :)
     
  21. InoSakuShine

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    And so it is :) hello


    When it Rains

    Sunny day in Kohona. The sun's blinding beams seemed to bound from every angle, and a rosy warmth settled in the air. The only cool retreat was the forest. For body and mind. It was nearing lunch.
    The blonde girl set out in the day with no expectations: she only wished to go see her cruch, Sasuke, and maybe talk to some people along the way. But that wasn't the whole story. We know Ino. Ino will always consequently bump into trouble, or Sakura, or is that the same thing?
    Ino walked down the Konoaha streets, heading for the forest, a irrestistable temptation. Just the day before she made a deal will Sakura that she would back off Sasuke-just a little. But Ino knew he was training there. She struggled with herself, then decided she'd just walk by. Really. Just. Walk. By.

    On the outskirts of the shaded trees, Ino felt reluctant. For Sakura's sake, she wouldn't go looking for Sasuke. Really, she was a considerate person. No one would really think too much about it. She guessed, it was the ough girl act. But it was so hot. She edged into the forest to get relief from the vicious sun. She found her self just skimming by the trees, headed toward a small local park.
    Looking into the trees. What deos she? Sasuke?
    "Sasuke?" She says. She moves closer. Sasuke is panting heavily, almost collasped on the ground.
    "He must have wore himself out," Ino says to herself. And not because she likes Sasuke. And not because she dislikes Sakura. but because she IS a caring person, and an overacheiver to top it, she slowly appraoches the exhausted ninja.
    "Sasuke? Are you okay!" She exclaims. Sasuke glances up at her. Apparently he didn't seem to notice her.
    "Huh?" Oh. It was her. "I'm fine."
    "If you don't take an easy," Ino warned, reffering to the kunai still in his hand,"You going to get seriously hurt here Sasuke!" She wasn't acting all "school-girl-ish," either. But...why the change? "Oh. come on..." She started to pick him up.
    "Ino...don't," Sasuke began, but then he let her HELP him up.
    She smiled at him. He was so cute. "OK. Now...." she trails off. Because, she sees Sakura, glaring at her as if she murdered someone.
    "Ino? Sasuke?" Her voice rang out. Then ," INO?"
    Now how this must look. Sasuke sighed to himself as he pulled off from Ino, although his knees were still shaking. I,t admittedly, flushed him to just look at Sakura right now. Ino stared at Sakura, eyes innocent. But did Sakura see that?
    "Sakura I-"
    "That's it." Sakura looked disgusted. "I thought we had a deal." Sakura is not a malicious person, but this time she was really outraged. Ino just-she just-.....sakura can't find the words."What are you doing here?" She managed.
    "What?" Ino said defensively. Why should she look explain herself to Sakura? And look weak in front of her? Or Sasuke? Or anybody? No way! "Can't I take a walk?" Why was little Sakura speaking to her like that, anyway! She...should know her place. Even if it wasn't below her, it was not above her, either.
    They were proven equals.
    "Sakura," Sasuke said. He began to get a splitting headache just litsening to them. "Don't..." He said simply. Sakura blinked. DOn't what? Don't argue? Don't protect him from Ino? Why was he defending her? Why was her Sasuke....defending Ino Pig?

    Sakura turns a violent shade of red. "Ino-why? You think your the leader of everything but you just RUIN everything!" Maybe she went to far. You never know when your going to unexpectedly strike a nerve.
    Ino. Her eyes widened. She was clearly upset.
    Did she just say that? That...which haunted Ino always. Ino-always the leader. Always rescuing others. No one ever cam to her aid. Shika and Choji were her teammates- not her hero. And how did she look anyway? Always bothering Sakura. Like the big villain? Sakura-her childhood friend- who despite what she said, she didn't want to let go. Freinds yet rivals, and more often Sasuke became just an excuse to talk to her old friend sakura. Did Sakura think she was too good for her?

    She didn't know that Sakura was afraid of being lost in her shadow. That never came across to Ino. JUst that this so called "friend", the one she always defended, did so much for, betrays her for a boy. Wasn't

    it she who broke up the ties of their friendship? Well?
    Burning hot anger flooded her. The most dangerous kind. Anger mixed with drops of sadness. Almost like the kind Sasuke had-but not quite really.
    They came very close to eachother and Sasuke watched warily. "What did you say? I ruin everything? Your just a spoiled brat!" She said. They are so mad they even abandon their childish insults like bilboard brow and Ino pig. "You take away everything that means something from me!" It was just the heat of the moment. Sakura didn't really mean that. But to Ino, the girl who tried to help her, her first friend. It was the final straw.

    She draws much too near. Ino clenches her fist, and pulls it back. She hits Sakura. She hits her in the cheek. It was if it was all in slow motion, until Sakura hits the ground.
    Before Ino could stop herself, she steps foward for more. She has lost control. She can't believe herself.

    And then Sasuke is between them, stopping the violence. "Enough already!" he says. Not as much for Sakura's protection, he didn't feel bad, this fight, for once, wasn't really about him, but because there was no need for two girls to be cat-fighting right now. Not when he would be the one responsible to haul thier unconcious bodies to shelter. But everyone is disblieving.

    Everyone's eyes are wide. Sakura's mouth is a "O". So is Ino's.
    Ino. She is...beyond upset. Just, look what she has done. That was her friend. And she deosn't see what's in front of her. Hot tempered, strong, standout of the rookie 9 Ino is on the verge of tears.

    She sees her little best friend Sakura, with the red bow in her hair, the one Ino once gave her, with a red cheek, and a protective Sasuke shielding her from the monster Ino. Of course, this is Guilt-o-vision.

    "Sa-Saukra...? I'm- I'm so-" She broke off. She was shaking. She backed away, staring at her hand-the one she struck Sakura with, like she had done in the Chunin preliminaries. But this time she hit her out of pure anger... Ino dissapeared in the forset once more.

    Sakura looked with sad eyes at the floor. "I have to go after her."
     
  22. Kouu Koigokoro

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    Oh, wow, that was good. I really like the way you wrote it with all the details and stuff.
     
  23. chishio-kun

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    You have an "eye" for detail. You also have an eye for "body language" type of things and how you can manipulate elements of writing together its so good! im addicted now!
     
  24. Tanaka Ichiro

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    Yea, 2 of them. :laugh

    Great update, CHA Take that Sakura, thats what u get for hitting Naruto all the time. BE-OTCH.:nod
     
  25. InoSakuShine

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    Oh you guys made my day-er-night! Thanks. I think the next update might be tommorow FYI.
    Thanks for reading (but I can tell you didnt read the first chapters) :) :) :)
     
  26. Tanaka Ichiro

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    WHAT DO U MEAN :O OF COURSE I DID
     
  27. InoSakuShine

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    YOU DID?? THANKS!!! lol.
    Its just that Im not trying to make Sakura the enemy here. As implied in the 1st chapter. Sorry I was extreemly busy today but Ill update tommorow FOR SURE. I think...:)
     
  28. InoSakuShine

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    Never Fail


    Struggling for breath. Her chest was heaving. Her throat burned as her lungs dropped into overtime. Ino had ran as fast a she could, she just ran away, as far as she could. Against the wall of the restroom building, she dropped down. She fell onto the ground, sitting against the wall. She buried her face in her hands and thought "Now Sakura is going to hate me. What have I done?"
    Really, she was even surprised at herself at how much she cared for Sakura. How much she cared or her teammates. SOme people, some people only saw the girl who ruthlessly insulted Sakura, the girl got in the way. Who saw the girl who saved Sakura's childhood, who gave her the ribbon to tie her hair back, the girl who defended her against people who made fun of her, who stepped in and saved her life against the sound ninjas in the Chunin exam, the girl who helped a fallen Rock Lee?
    Only her teammates could clearly see Ino as she was, Shikamaru and Choji. But they were her teammates. She always had to be the strong leader. She had to help everyone else. She never had a hero to help her. But the protectivness over Sakura didn't fade with their friendliness toward eachother. Not at all.

    "Ino?" a voice called. She looked up and narrowed her eyes, as she saw Sasuke and Sakura standing before her. Sakura looked guilty. As if she were the one who hit Ino. Sasuke, overall, was a bit aggravated with the current situation. Sakura hadn't asked him to come, but he felt somewhat responsible
    to the condition of the girls. Damn it.

    "Sakura I'm really sorry."
    "It's OK. You didn't hurt me. Don't you know I can take a punch," she said, looking directly at her.

    The tension seemed to decrease uopn thier eye contact. How Ironic. Its seems like everything will be OK.

    "Ino, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that stuff. But you don't need to protect me anymore. Im not little Sakura anymore. That's right! I'm competition! I just don't want to be outdone by you.
    Ino smiled. "But I'm not trying to be better than you ALL the time. Why can't we give it a rest sometime?
    "That deossn't sound too bad." Words are not always spoken clearly, but in their eyes they had a whole conversation. And both of them understood. Sakura offered her hand to the sitting kunoichi, and helped her up. They were no longer in the cool shade under the protection of the tall trees, but vulnerbale in the beating sun. But that was OK too. Sun can be cool, too.
    And Sasuke walked away. Away from the "Hey, Sasuke! Where are you going? Aren't you hurt?" That was enough sentimetality for one day. If he had to see or hear anymore, he might throw up. And behind him, he
    thought he heard to voices say,
    "But it deosn't mean I'm giving up Sasuke.!"
    "Oh yeah?"
    What the hell? Girls.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    The people of Konoha were so grateful for the simmering evening that fell over the village like a silk blanket. It was slightly dark, and the coolness washed in like a tidal wave, yet the night was warm. Hinata found herself searching for some Icharika's after a long hard training.
    Finally, she found the familiar Ramen place and took a seat. Quiet as always. But she jumped when she heard a voice beside her say, "Hinata, hey! What are you doing here?"
    How could she have failed to notice Naruto, sitting right beside her too. Maybe she was too focused on being HInata. Quiet, shy, small.
    If she had seen him she might not have came! "Hi, Naruto. I, " She said. It was like just talking to him took the biggest effort.
    "-Oh. Stupid question I guess. Heheheh," Naruto, just being funny cool Naruto. "Can I get you something?"
    "Oh, no, it's OK!" HInata insisted. He just offered her a meal. Her heart faints.
    "Um, Naruto, I-" she begins to say.
    "Is that SAKURA?" Naruto exclaims and jumps up and runs off. Not before saying, "Hey I'll catch you later OK? See ya!" NAruto. He's not really that rude. He understands people, but it's not like the conversation was going to go anywhere, anyway.
    Hinata's eyes frowned. Stupid Hinata, she told herself. You talk, all shy and embbarssed, and he deosnt even notice you! Its the same thing everyday. Its getting old. Whats wrong with you?
    She continued to beat herself up, just fallling into the same trap all over again. Shes sighs, knowing this, gets up, and goes home. No big comfort there.
    But Hinata was wrong about one thing. Naruto did notice her. This time, he did. But she didn't notice him. It's like her Byakkugan is becoming too powerful, and she is just staring straight through things. But she's so cute, isn't she. Not entirely off the ground yet.
     
  29. Kouu Koigokoro

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    Hah, that was really good. I really love the way you wrote Hinata.
     
  30. InoSakuShine

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    Thanks. Hinata will be re-occuring.

    _________off topic_______

    Your sig-about photoshop. Its GREAT. (but you have to download stuff off the internet to get its full quality)
     
    Last edited: Oct 14, 2006
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