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Dating/Marrying the former partner of your unfaithful spouse's lover...

Discussion in 'Konoha Country Club' started by Polaris, Apr 2, 2018.

  1. Polaris Sagittarius Sun/Aquarius Ascendant

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    This thread is inspired by something that I read about the singer Shania Twain’s personal life.

    Her current husband is her best friend’s ex husband (who cheated on Shania with her best friend). They apparently fell in love with each other after confiding in each other during the time when they’d both recently been left by their cheating spouses.

    What are your thoughts on this? Do you think it’s a good idea to marry or date someone that used to be the partner of your unfaithful spouse’s lover, generally speaking?
     
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  2. Itachі Man of The People

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    If they're cool then why not. Though if I was cheated on in a serious relationship then I'd probably back out of the game for a bit.
     
  3. Aphrodite

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    This is how i see it. If they cheat on others then they will cheat on you.
     
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  4. Mider T Oh Christmas T!

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    This is like the most beta thing ever.
     
  5. Polaris Sagittarius Sun/Aquarius Ascendant

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    Would you care to elaborate?
     
  6. selfconcile Active Member

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    Had to read the title a couple times before I got it.
    I'm guessing you mean:

    - Shania's ex-husband cheated on her with her best friend
    - Her husband now is her best friend's ex-husband
    - Neither Shania nor her current husband were cheating in their respective previous relationships

    -

    I don't know about dating or marrying, but we would probably form some kind of bond borne from a shared experience of loss and betrayal. I can't really imagine it clearly though so I'm not sure... I mean, I can, but it's not something I'd want to entertain.

    I mean I can't empathize with that hypothetical person, and If it came down to that I was cheated on, my reactions might surprise me in hindsight and my judgment might be so clouded by anger that I'd do something I wouldn't do otherwise... like sleep with my cheating spouse's lover or something messed up.
     
  7. ~M~ Do it for her

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    The past is past
     
  8. Santi K D A Super Moderator

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    This is convoluted and I don't understand.
     
  9. Shrike Let's Baby

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    No. It would be too weird and pull so many unpleasant things along.
     
  10. Cheeky 21st Century Schizoid Man

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    Y'all should check out In the Mood for Love. It's a classic.
     
  11. Kuzehiko Infinite

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    No, that's just terrible.
     
  12. Polaris Sagittarius Sun/Aquarius Ascendant

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    It kinda feels like justice was served. Her bff stole her ex-husband, so Shania stole her bff’s ex-husband in return. Love is not a button that you can just switch on and off, so I bet their relationship has evoked a certain degree of jealousy in their cheating ex spouses.

    I gotta admit that I wonder if Shania ever thinks to herself bitterly, “That homewrecker has shared intimate moments with both of my husbands” and if her current husband’s presence reminds her of his ex spouse who betrayed and hurt her deeply.

    Yes, that's what I mean.

    Read what selfconcile wrote in the quote above.
     
  13. Smoke ▄█▀ █▄ █▄█ ▀█▀

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    Sure, why not?

    It's easier for 2 people to carry 40 lbs, than it is to carry 20 lbs by yourself.

    Same thing with baggage. You can share it.

    Everyone's happy.
     
  14. Avalon

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    Never.
     
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  15. White Wolf Super Moderator

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    That's convoluted as hell both in writing and in practice, since it comes down to two faithful people getting the shaft it's alright of an option for them to come to terms together, but at the same time there's probably some psychological trauma attached to both that'll cause issues.

    It's not something I'd seek out, but if it happened it happened.
     
  16. Subarashii Obaa-chan

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    The two parties who were cheated on I'm sure had a lot to talk about and confide in each other, so why not date?
     
  17. DemonDragonJ Agnus Dei

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    If a person was not faithful to their former partner, I could not trust them to be faithful to me; them wishing for a threesome or foursome, however, is another matter entirely.

    I am sorry that I need to ask, but how is that the case? Either way, one person is lifting 20 pounds.
     
    Last edited: Apr 8, 2018
  18. savior2005 Well-Known Member

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    I tend to agree with this, but I do think that people can change (or at least I'd like to hope so). A past cheater can stop cheating, while someone who has never cheated b4 can eventually end up cheating.
     
  19. Aphrodite

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    Ive never known a cheater to stop cheating. Not saying they can't cause people make mistakes but ive yet to see it.
     
  20. A. Waltz Ho Ho Ho;)

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    yikes nah kinda sounds lame tbh. youll both just be bitter and salty over your exes.
     
  21. Kiseki Release The Kraken

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    All the people who think she means the 'cheating one' didn't read it right. She means the person who got cheated on by your ex. So that could mean that this person could still be faithful, since they know what it's like to be cheated on. But erhm... this is all just too messed up either way, in my opinion. I wouldn't want to tangled in my ex's things: past or future. There's always a chance they bring up your ex a lot.
     
  22. Lord Valgaav Atomic Sables!

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    Sounds like some Trapped in The Closet type shit to me.

    But, to each his own.:kanyeshrug
     
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