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I'd hate to be assigned this story...

Discussion in 'The NF Café' started by Renegade Raine, Nov 25, 2005.

  1. Renegade Raine Queen of GrimmHime

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    This article left me in disbelief...

    "They broke up after 43 years together citing irreconcilable differences. Now, after a mere 18 months apart, Ken wants Barbie back.

    What's more he is prepared to make the effort to change. He will unveil a new look early next year and his spokesman at the manufacturers Mattel promises a radical, highly secret, rethink.

    In the 1970s this plastic doll's masculine Elvis Presley look made Barbie's plastic heart skip a beat. But more than four decades on, Ken's metrosexual blonde beach boy image helped to lead the love of his life to dump him for an Australian surfer called Blaine. Mattell stopped promoting the two together and Ken was pushed to the back of the toy shop shelves.

    Russell Arons, the doll's personal manager and publicist, admits that Ken "has been in conversation" with some of Britain's and Hollywood's celebrity stylists in an attempt to win Barbie back. "A make-over may be just what Ken needs," said Ms Arons, the vice-president of marketing at Mattel.

    A company insider said: "For far too long Blaine has been basking in Ken's limelight. Ken's fans should expect big changes next spring and Blaine should be ready for a fight if he wants to keep Barbie."

    Ken, who has been 23 for 45 years, admits that he has had plastic surgery to "re-sculpt his face" and has not ruled out another operation.

    He told The Sunday Telegraph, through a statement from Mattel: "My new look will be something very now. My style will reflect my personality and will change with my mood on any given day." The British stylist Kenny Ho, who has advised David Beckham and Pierce Brosnan, said Ken needed to go "slick and urban" to win back Barbie, and be less of a fashion victim.

    "Ken needs to look effortless and cool without trying too hard. I'm sure Barbie would appreciate a man who spends less time in the bathroom than she does and wouldn't upstage her on a night out. He should go for slim-fitting shirts, low V-neck knitwear, straight-cut, flat-front trousers, single-breasted jackets and military-inspired coats."

    Hollywood stylist Phillip Bloch, whose clients include Nicole Kidman, feels that Ken needs to move with the times. "Ken is one of those guys who has too much of one style. You have to be able to change it up - be able to go from Oscars to Emmys to hanging out with friends," Mr Bloch said.

    Lou Ford, the deputy editor of the women's magazine Cosmopolitan, said Ken had no chance of getting Barbie back looking like "George Michael from the 1980s".

    "Ken looks gay. His body and face are good but he is too groomed," said Miss Ford. "Women today like their men to be in touch with their feminine side and take pride in their appearance. But they still want them to be masculine."

    Ken found fame at the 1961 American International Toy Fair. Later that year he met Barbie on the set of a television commercial. Ken's image started to slip in the 1990s as he became a businessman, baseball player, explorer and rock star.

    Ken said: "Time apart has helped me to realise what's important. Barbie is the love of my life." Barbie was not available for comment but a close friend said: "She's curious as to how Ken will change his look. Whether it will make her want him back, we?ll have to wait and see.?

    -Credit telegraph.co.uk

    What...the...hell. THEY'RE FUCKING DOLLS. Who cares?!
     
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  2. Luckey Wants his custom title.

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    lol.... seriously.
     
  3. batanga 6 1 15-45 300

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    ...

    I... I´m speechless :oh






    :rofl
     
  4. nah-nah Believe it-ttebayo!

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    Whoa. It's like these people actually believe the dolls are real people. I'm kind of creeped out.

    XD
     
  5. Raistlin-sama Have you been naughty or nice?

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    I don't care what they are... This is awesome satire:laugh
     
  6. Sakura Kaijuu There is only the inevitable

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    Huh...Well, it's about time Ken got an actual makeover.

    The way it's written reminds me of the Malibu Stacy episode of The Simpsons, when Lisa meets the real Malibu Stacy and all the other dolls in her line are based directly on her ex-husbands.

    But the Barbie-Ken drama has kept me on the edge of my seat!:eyeroll
     
  7. TheGreatYugi Member

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    I knew this shit would happen. It's all marketing strategies. No one gives a fuck.
     
  8. Dyroness x

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    Oh? I know people obsessed with barbies like that. :iik
     
  9. Jef88 88

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    talk about plastic surgery
    changing the look of a man doll :oh

    that made me laugh :D
     
  10. Id The Demon of Elru

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    Um....there nothing wrong with barbies. To a "certain degree".
     
  11. Lancelot Member

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    haha thats real funny :D
     
  12. gitwer Spewer of Wisdom

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    Yeah, Barbie's only been around for 40+ years. It's just a passing fad... :blink
     
  13. mgrace Guess Who's Back?!?!?!

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    Barbie should be placed on the Barbie and Cooked to medium rare..
     
  14. ninamori Well-Known Member

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    Awwww... So cute.

    Doll love. <3
     
  15. Heldensheld Chunnin

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  16. Anax Ονειροβάμων

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    Funny! And yeah, the plastic surgery part just ruled! What was the song by Aqua again? "I'm a Barbie girl"? :D
     
  17. Sawako

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    rofl wtf. I can't believe that they have a whole plotline for dolls.
     
  18. Stormnova New Member

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    That's awesome satire... So their replacing Ken with James Bond dolls.
     
  19. gamesector Future Legend

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    They may be just toys but they are some of the bestselling toys of all-time, lol.
     
  20. RockLee is no brethren unto Kaminae

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    Well! Time for me to check the tabloids!

    Why I left Blaine, by Barbie. Secrets revealed!

    XD
     
  21. G. Hawke The one who left

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    >.<
    This is madness..........
     
  22. Grrblt Banned

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    People write fanfics about Naruto all the time and he's not even a doll. I don't see the problem.
     
  23. Heldensheld Chunnin

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