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My First Fanfic

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by Capitan Jack Sparrow, Feb 6, 2005.

  1. Capitan Jack Sparrow

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    Jan 24, 2005

    Rio?s Entrance

    Chapter 1

    Man: I now proclaim you the king of this planet.

    Our king is a kind man with short back hair and dark blue eyes that reflect the moon and wears his families royal colours he is also tall and buff in build.

    King: Thank you I will rule this planet with a kind heart and a determination to get rid of all people that made the last king suicidal.

    Man: Well my king Pellete it is late and these people will need their rest for tomorrow?s war on Teras.

    Pellete: Yes I must also leave I need to return to my wife and family.

    Wife: I knew you would become the new king *jumps up and down*.

    Pellete: Where?s my little champion?

    As the king says this a boy of 5 enters from a side room with half his clothes torn off and scratches and burn marks every where he walks up to his father and offers his hand as the king looks at his second son he sees his wife?s dark green eyes and his own long dark blue scruffy hair.

    After his father shakes his hand he goes out and starts to train.

    (Young boys view)

    As the boy goes outside he slams the door and goes out into the middle of the field that his family owns and starts to yell and concentrate on his body and moves all the energy inside of him into his hand and a small ball of light appears that makes the sky light up. He looks at the ball and it starts to grow and then he throws it hundreds of feet and then it shoots back at him and he flies towards it and starts to attack the small ball.

    Boy: I can do this I can defeat this small part of my energy.

    As he flies towards it his father and older brother appear in the sky.

    Boy: huh?

    Father: Rio you are strong but can you take me and Codrea down.
    Codrea is just exactly like his father except he is taller and has lighter hair than both the king and Rio have.

    Rio: Ok let?s go and I will win *grins*.

    Codrea: Ha you can?t beat us both you will lose before you move from that spot *gets into a defensive position*
    Rio: Ok let?s go I will win and I will fulfil my destiny *shouts* I will be the best warrior ever and you will all remember me as the greatest warrior of this planet.

    As he finishes the little speech the King flies at him and thinks this must be the 20th time that he?s said that and then tries to punch him in the face but as the punch comes Rio sees the punch in slow motion and he dodges to the side and knees him in the gut *crunch* as he pulls away his knee he jumps on his back and pushes off towards his brother and kicks him in the side of the face *whack* but as he?s floating down his brother sends off a small ki blast and it hits Rio in the back *AHHHH* as he falls towards the field below he sees his father flying towards him and he elbows him in the back of the neck *crash!* and sends him flying even faster towards the earth as he hits the earth *Booom* a giant cloud of rubble and dust flies up and hits his brother after his father has hit the rubble Rio hits it too but his father gets up and flies back into the sky.

    Chapter 2 coming soon

    Rio?s Greatest Day

    Chapter 2

    As Rio gets up out of the rubble his father and brother land each side and shoot ki blasts just before they crash into the ground Rio jumps up into the sky at floats there gathering his energy to perform his ultimate attack. As he gathers more energy his hair starts to stand on end and go red from the normal long shaggy black that it usually is as he gets close to his peak of energy he shoots towards his father and brother.

    Super Rio: Ultimo Rio Blaster!!!!!....FIRE!!!

    As the blast comes out of Rio?s hands he falls from the sky and lands with a loud *crash * on the ground. As the blast flies towards the king and Codrea they both also charge up and they stop the blast and direct it toward the empty field in front of them as the blast hit the field *Boooooooom* the father and brother duo hit the dust in front of Rio and they both help up Rio and take him In and as they walk home the King tells Rio that he is going to go to Jinketsu?s school of warriors as Rio hears this he turns round and stops his dad.

    Rio: Are u joking I m going to Jinketsu?s school that?s the best school there is and it needs a test but I haven?t had one yet.

    King: Oh yes u have what was that you just did we got a call from Jinketsu saying that we could do you?re passing test along as we went full out *smiles*

    Codrea: Nice job little dude *smiles*.

    Rio: Thanks guys I really want to get good and become the greatest warrior EVER

    King + Codrea: We know!

    (Outside house)

    As the sky becomes dark and the stars start to appear in the peaceful night?s sky they sit down to tea and then the talk about techniques over a large bowl of noodles that the kings wife had been cooking as the bowl in the middle starts to get empty they each start to go off into their own rooms to sleep for the long night to come.


    Rio: Come on bro lets train *shakes*.

    Codrea: *yawn* ok I will be up soon.
    As Codrea gets up Rio goes out and is about to power up when he sees a man walking towards their house as he gets closer Rio goes into a defensive position and rushes him but before he can get 2 paces his brother smacks him over the head and Rio lands harshly into the ground.

    Codrea: Ok little punk lets go *smiles*

    Rio: *brush...Brush* you bastard you hit me over the head.

    Codrea: You wanted to train so let?s train wimp.

    Rio: Ok asshole lets train.

    As they both rush at each other a ki blast goes between them and they both look left and see the guy that Rio had seen.

    Codrea: Who the hell are you?

    Rio: That?s Jinketsu I think but let?s go see if he?s the real deal.

    Codrea: *winks* let?s give him the Super brother duo.

    Rio: Ok let?s get him.

    As they both charge up there spiritual energy there hair becomes red and stands up.
    They both rush at the stranger with a flying kick as they are just about to hit with a crushing blow the man catches their feet and throws them away making them crash into the ground. As the dust clears Rio pops up.

    Rio: What the hell I didn?t even see him move

    Codrea appears with his uniform in bits

    Codrea: He?s so fast that?s the real Jinketsu all right.

    Rio: Yes!!!! He?s here to pick me up *jumps up and down* YAHHOOO

    Chapter 3 Soon

    Credit of the name Jinketsu goes to Alex Hiro (Crono)

    Jinketsu?s School

    Chapter 3

    As Jinketsu stops and watches Rio fly towards him as Rio stops he looks into the face of Jinketsu what he sees is spiky hair and these dark black eyes although Jin has nothing hidden Rio gets the feeling that he has a lot to hide.

    Rio: Hi

    Jin: So you must be my next student.

    Rio: *smiles* yeah that?s me.

    Rio: Ok if you stay right here I will say bye to my family and I will get my stuff ok?

    Jin: Ok but be quick we need to pick up other students

    Rio: Ok

    As Rio runs into the house he is greeted by his whole family and his mother with all his stuff all ready packed.

    Rio: Thanks mom

    Wife: That?s ok son now you go and be the greatest warrior this planet has ever seen.

    Dad: Ok son just go and do your best.

    Codrea: Ok moron go and become strong.

    Rio: *grr* moron ill give you moron when your eating my shoe.

    Once the good byes are said and everything is done Jin and Rio head to pick up the next student in the town of Ley which is a strange town with a lot of incredibly strong warriors that saved the planet when it came near to destruction which is seldom talked about these days.

    Jin: Ok this is the place where Samariku lives.

    Rio: Cool

    Jin: Ok Sam lets go

    Sam: Who?s the punk.

    Rio: *arrrr* Punk ill give you punk when why foots half up your ass.

    As they journey to all the near by towns they pick up new kids and the items that are needed for the journey back to the school but as they walk through the Konamarh woods Jin feels that they are being followed by a Teras mercenary as Jin turns round a throwing star catches him in the shoulder

    Jin: *Ahhhh* Get together in a defensive circle

    Rio: Why who is out there or should I say what is out there.

    Jin: Rio it?s a mercenary

    Rio: Ok so you think your so good do you picking on us show yourself and let?s punk.

    Mystery: Ok little boy let?s fight

    Rio jumps out of his defensive stance and flies into the sky and starts to power up then with a small bang his hair turns red.

    Sam: Ok he?s as big a wimp as I though he was.

    Jin: Rio get your little ass down here now!!!!

    Rio: No! Now where are you bastard?

    Mystery: Right behind you dunce.

    Rio: Oh! Shit

    As Rio turns round he charges a ki blast and sends it flying into mystery

    Rio: AHHHH take this

    Mystery: AHHHH that hurt punk you will.

    As he finishes these words he throws twenty throwing stars at Rio as Rio doges them he gets caught of guard by a small ki blast from mystery and falls to the ground.

    Rio: *panting* Ah that was a good trick but this is only the start.

    As Rio gets up he charges his spiritual energy even more and his eyes go red.

    Jin: Oh so this is the power of their family is it.

    Rio: Let?s go scum I can take anyone down now.

    Mystery: Let?s test that theory.

    Mystery runs at Rio and try?s to punch him but at Rio?s current speed he doges all the punches with ease and sends Mystery flying with a kick to mid section.
    Chapter 4 Soon
  2. Capitan Jack Sparrow

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    Jan 24, 2005
    Rio Chapter 4

    As Rio kicked Mystery he sent of a medium sized ki blast which caught Mystery off the side of the face and sent him face first into the dirt.

    Super Rio Form 2: *panting* Seems I was right I can take anyone down now

    Mystery rips back his face mask.

    Jin: SHIT!! Move kid that?s Zebazu he?s feared and expelled from 4 countries and he?s one of the greatest assassins the world has.

    Rio Form 2: He?s Weak.

    Jin: Stupid Kid get over here right now!

    Rio: NOOOO he?s my opponent and no one will take him away from me not even you Jin.


    Rio: SHUT up it?s my fight

    Jin: Ok

    Rio shoots towards Zebazu and tries to hit him but it seems that his speed is greater and as Rio turns to hit him again he kicks Rio in the back of the head.

    Rio: FUCK YOU I won?t lose to the likes of you because one day I will be the greatest warrior in the world and everyone will acknowledge me.

    Zebazu: Punk you?ve got no chance of beating me.

    As he says this Rio gets up and charges his spiritual energy until his pupils disappear and replaced two half circles and a small dot in the middle.

    Rio Form 3: Ok lets see you beat me now.

    Zebazu stumbles back and falls down.

    Zebazu: NO way he?s gone past his father and I have seen him fight at full strength.

    Rio: *evil laugh* You will die before you can move a muscle.

    Jin: *walks 2 steps* Rio don?t do it a warrior lives a life of no regrets.

    Rio shoots forward and elbows Zebazu in the stomach and them starts to punch him in the stomach as he goes on the speed increases soon his arms are just blurs.

    Sam: Shit that?s not natural ok I am faster and stronger than the normal person but this is just crazy.

    Other Students: GO RIO KICK HIS ASS

    Jin: Stop you fools you are driving him on stop shouting and he will?hopefully calm down.

    Rio stops and lets Zebazu take a breath of air.

    Rio: I told you Jin this weak piece of crap cant beat me.

    But as he is about to give the last blow Zebazu vanishes and leaves Rio surprised

    Rio: DAM where did he go I was just about to win.

    Jin: Ok power house power down and lets get going.

    Rio powers down to normal Rio and gets his bag and walks on with the rest as they walk on the school comes into sight with its huge wooden doors and red sign


    Chapter 5 soon

    Sry its so short I cant think of much more but the next one will be much longer

    And just for anyone that im copyin someone elses work nope its all my own work

    Chapter 5

    Rio?s New Friend

    Hikari: Hi Rio.

    Rio:*smiles* Hi what?s your name.

    Hikari: I am Hikari

    Hikari: I really liked the way that you tried to take down that Zebazu guy.

    Rio: Thanks

    Jin: Ok guys let?s get started on the training.

    Pupils: OK

    Jin: Then to start with try to take me down

    Rio: Come on Hikari let?s get him

    Hikari: Sure Rio!

    Rio charges up his Ki and his eyes turn red then Hikari charges up and gets into a defensive stance.

    Rio flies at Jin and tries to make a hit but Jin deflects the punch and sends Rio flying into a tree.

    Hikari looks at Jin and he goes ridged and can?t move.

    Jin: SHIT I can?t move

    Hikari rushes Jin and strikes him down with a punch.

    Jin: *ahhh*

    Rio gets up and rushes towards Jin as well and strikes him down with a elbow to the gut.

    Jin: *ARGGG*

    Jin gets up and holds his stomach.

    Jin: Ok you are ok you two don?t need training.

    Rio and Hikari: YES!!!!! Were the champs

    Hikari: Let?s go get some chow.

    Rio: Sure

    Jin: *aaahh*

    Sam: Do I get to leave now

    Jin: YESS

    Sam: Hey guys wait up

    Rio and Hikari turn round

    Rio: Hey Samariku

    Sam: Rio you must know that we are rivals but we are still friends right?

    Rio: eeemmm *smiles* Sure we are

    Chapter 6 Soon ^_^

    Credit to Rico for the name Hikari

    Plz Rate
  3. nikita

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    Aug 29, 2007
    Is there alod to be sware words if not then i'm busted

    The cool wind brushed against her face making her cheeks go numb because of the cold. Her small body was wrapped in a thin sweater and a skirt that barely reached passed her knees. The sound of her small footsteps was unheard because of the loud footsteps of the boy next to her, holding her hand. She was able to feel her cheeks get hot because of the blush that began to make its way over her face. But, luckily for her, it was unnoticed by the boy.
    She bit her bottom lip and tilted her head to the ground. Usually when she was nervous, she would fiddle with her fingers to distract her from whatever made her nervous. Unfortunately, at this moment, her hands were a little bit occupied by the fingers of the boy that were tied with hers. His hand was warmer compared to hers, and slightly sweaty. The cold expression on his face hasn?t changed much since they left the restaurant that he took her to, for their date. Then again, his expression is the same most of the time.
    She really doesn?t know why he wanted to ask her out, or why she agreed. But it was something she doesn?t regret doing, because she really had a good time, and it increased her crush on him. He was being a completely different person for Hinata. He would hold the door for her, he would greet her by giving her a hug, and he would use polite manners, and was sure to keep a good conversation going. And Hinata wasn?t afraid to say that she enjoyed Sasuke?s behavior in front of her. The thought of him doing all that for only her made her bite her lip harder until it turned a little red.
    ?If you keep biting your lip like that it will start bleeding.? He spoke breaking the silence. Hinata only nodded and blushed nervously. Her fingers tied tighter with his as her teeth began to dig into her bottom lip. She mumbled something. Something he couldn?t really understand, but he decided just to ignore it.
    The date was wonderful. He was able to afford the fanciest and most expensive restaurant in the village. Plus, it was the most she?d heard him talk before. That?s probably what she enjoyed most about the date, the fact that they were actually able to have a good conversation, and she didn?t stutter once in her sentences.
    But, why is it now, on the walk home, they can?t even say anything good to start a conversation? The thought just made her teeth dig deeper into her lip.
    Sasuke looked over at her and raised and eyebrow. ?You okay there, Hinata-chan?? Hinata again only nodded and mumbled something he still was unable to understand. He grabbed a strand over hair and pushed it behind her ear. ?I was barely able to see your adorable face behind those bangs of yours.? He said in his same cold tone but sounded somewhat romantic.
    It made Hinata blush even more. Her teeth dug deeper into her lips ?til she was able to feel a little bit of blood trickle down her lips.
    She licked her lips and tried to stop the red liquid from gushing out and onto her chin. She did that and tried her best to make sure that Sasuke doesn?t see. ?Hey, S-Sasuke-kun??
    ?I had a w-wonderful t-time with you. Everything was v-very l-lovely?? Hinata spoke quietly while occasionally licking her lips. Sasuke stared at her, his expression becoming less cold. ?A-and you l-look very handsome?? Sasuke blushed slightly and smirked.
    ?And might I say, Hinata-chan,? Sasuke began. ?You look?? Sasuke stopped in the middle of his sentence, grabbing Hinata?s chin and looking into her pale white eyes. ?? So fucking Sexy.? Hinata blushed and let go of her lip, letting the blood drip down onto her chin slowly. ?Hinata-chan?? Sasuke whispered pulling themselves closer. ?I told you that if you keep biting your lip like that, that it would bleed.?
    Hinata could only stare at Sasuke. Her face flushed and her eyes wide. She felt as though her heart would flop out of her chest and fall onto the ground and wiggle around craving for air. There was a giant lump in her throat that prevented her from speaking, like food that she forgot to chew and she was now choking on.
    ?Hinata-chan?? Sasuke whispered in a sexy husky voice. ?Let me stop the bleeding.?
    ?Sasuke?kun?? Hinata was only able to spit those words out. Soon, she found Sasuke in front of her face, his tongue trailing over her bottom lip. Hinata was shocked, too shocked to move. His tongue tickled her bottom lip as it moved side to side and up and down, collecting all the blood on his tongue. This was strange, it was like he was kissing her, but there lips didn?t even press together. It was more of him rubbing his saliva over her mouth.
    But she didn?t just want him lick her lip. She wanted more.
    Her mouth opened slightly, allowing her tongue to snake out of her mouth. Sasuke didn?t expect that so he took a step back, but Hinata found her way to his mouth again, sharing a rough and wild kiss. Her hands found her way to the back of his head, clawing his hair ?til it hurt him. But he didn?t pay attention to the pain. He was far too distracted. His hands squeezed her back, wrinkling her clothes beneath his fingers. They were both in a different world at the moment, a world of burning passion and lust. Anything about real life was completely pushed aside. Because the only had one thought on their mind. Whose tongue will win the duel?
    Hinata pulled away first, her forehead slightly covered in sweat and gasping for air. She buried her face in his neck and breathed heavily on his neck. The feeling of her breath tickling his neck turned him on even more than he already was. ?Sasuke-kun,? Hinata whispered. ?Take me to your house,? she begged. ?Please??
    Sasuke, already knowing what was going to happen there, did not hesitate to answer. ?Of course.?
    ?Mmnn?? Hinata stirred slowly opening her eyes and finding a light that blinded her vision. AT the moment she felt exhausted and a little sore in her muscles and her hair was sticking to her forehead with sweat. She turned her head finding Sasuke sleeping soundly next to her. The only part visible of him was his bare chest and face. His hair was tangled and he too had some hairs sticking to his head because of sweat.
    She scooted closer to him and held him in her arms. Her face managed to get buried in his chest. Seeing as how well this date ended, she couldn?t wait for their next one. She just needed to make sure she bit her lip enough again.

    Review me and tell me how insane I am!! This fic was pretty fun to work on, so it needs reviews! Thank you for reading!