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Psychological boundaries

Discussion in 'Konoha Country Club' started by Polaris, Oct 11, 2018.

  1. Polaris

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    They fall into four categories;

    Soft; A person with soft boundaries merges with other people's boundaries. Someone with soft boundaries is easily manipulated.

    Spongy; A person with spongy boundaries is like a combination of having soft and rigid boundaries. They permit less emotional contagion than soft boundaries but more than rigid. People with spongy boundaries are unsure what to let in and what to keep out.

    Rigid; A person with rigid boundaries is closed or walled off so nobody can get close to them, either physically or emotionally. This is often the case if someone has been physically, emotionally or psychologically abused. Rigid boundaries can be dependent on time, place or circumstances and are usually based on a bad previous experience in a similar situation.

    Flexible; This is the ideal. Similar to selective, rigid boundaries but the person has more control. The person decides what to let in and what to keep out, is resistant to emotional contagion and manipulation, and is difficult to exploit.

    So, what kind of boundaries do you have?
     
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  2. Lurker

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  3. Samael

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    Flexible, but rigid a bit as well.
     
  4. White Wolf

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    A rigid sponge? I guess :catthinks
     
  5. Jim

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    I can't tell
     
  6. Takano-san

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    This sounds like me.
     
  7. Cereza

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  8. Sequester

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    I fit none of these categories, I don't have problems letting people In my life nor do I pump trust into them.

    I used to be rigid though.
     
  9. ~M~

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  10. Lord Valgaav

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    I'm rigid. I've been all kinds of abused in my life. :cattired
     
  11. Polaris

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    Heh, that's an amusing way of putting it. Anyway, that makes two of us.
     
  12. Jim

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    they seem to all be written negatively
     
  13. Polaris

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    Well, the first three ones are unhealthy boundaries from a psychological perspective.
     
  14. A. Waltz

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    i honestly have no idea.. i dont try to keep people out, but i dont really see people try to come in either. so is that something im doing or giving off unconsciously? so maybe im rigid but dont notice it.
    but i do let some people in even if it takes time. but it's selective for people i want. if i dont want/like that person then i dont really associate with them or let them in.
     
  15. Island Moderator

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    Where did these categories come from?
     
  16. Kitsune Global Moderator

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    It's hard to objectively evaluate oneself, but I think I'm in the "flexible" category. I like to be open to communication and willing to hear what people have to say, but I'm very stubborn about allowing outside influence to exert itself over me. It's important to be open enough to listen and learn, but to keep a very stringent filter what you allow to influence you. It's hard to know how far to go one way or the other, but you just do you best and hope it's enough.
     
  17. is a

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    its a single psychologist's definition

    nina brown

    website

    tl;dr

    she's a hack
     
  18. RemChu

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    Never heard of this shit, no wonder.
     
  19. AJBeckyBlissRollins

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  20. Mali

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    i think im a blend of soft and rigid in that im easily manipulated but only by the select few people that i love. a sexy mix that does wonders for depression!
     
  21. Smoke

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    I'm soft when I'm with a hot chick, and rigid when I meet her pimp.
     
  22. Yamato

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    Between rigid and flexible, but more towards rigid.
     
  23. Selena

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    Spongy, with rigid tendencies.
     
  24. 1337RedGlitchFox

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    Id like to say Rigid due to being raised asian.

    But im more of a sponge guy.

    Sometimes im left feeling uncaring for someone and another goes "What the fuck? What's wrong with you? How did i raise you to be so fucked up?"

    And other times i care too much and someone goes "You dont need to worry about other people. Mind your own business."


    Real confusing. Im tis but a young mentlegen constantly being told im wrong or not doing something good enough.

    .

    So yknow, like an asian.
     
  25. Sanguíne Symphony

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  26. Dr. White

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    Flexible master race
     
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