Today, I learned the horrible truth about the evil place of devilish lies, deceit, and hatred, also known as IBM. It all started August 26th, 2005, my birthday. It is customary for IBM to give cakes to the person who is celebrating their day of birth. I received NO CAKE. Months later, and a new addition named Steve "Champ" Champlain, started to gain noteriaty around the office. He was hailed as the king of calls after just being here a few simple weeks. Everyone knew him, the managers knew him, random co-workers knew him, and they all loved him. So much so you could see one of the managers polishing his knob routinely any day of the week. Well, his birthday rolled around, and of course, he got A CAKE. Just the day after that, another cake sprung up. A birthday cake. For someone I didn't even know. A week later, yet another birthday cake. I was angered and outraged, but I let it slide. Shortly thereafter they changed my schedule around, so that my lunch is at 1:30. I thought nothing of it at first, until I went to the company lunch room for lunch. IT WAS CLOSED. Yes, it was closed, and at first I thought it was just that day. I came the next day, and the next, closed both times. I started to worry. Day after day, closure after closure, I began to realize a pattern. Eventually, I realized that the lunch room just so HAPPENS to close... at 1:30. Conspiracy? Perhaps... but not enough evidence to call them out on it... UNTIL TODAY. Yes today was the worst. Potluck day. Hours? 11am-2pm. At first glance you might think, "hey they left it open for you!" but you are WRONG. My lunch break rolled around, and I had received the e-mail. I wandered over to meeting room L10 where it was taking place. The room, was empty. Crock-pots, bags of cookies, chips, and platters thrown about. And not a single morsel of food. At least, none that was edible. Yes, another ploy, directed towards me. They are scoffing at me. Teasing me with the late 2pm deadline, making me think I had a chance at free food. I WAS SO TERRIBLY WRONG. As of today, this very moment, I officially HATE IBM. I am tempted to walk out, go on strike, complain, or just straight up quit. What should I do? You tell me.