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Why are men so bad at chat up lines?

Discussion in 'Philosophical Forum' started by Bubbles, Dec 5, 2005.

  1. Bubbles now with 25% extra air

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    Ok, I get chatted up alot, it can be very flattering but most of the time just hideous! I've had all the classics such as: -
    What you doing later?
    Do you come here often?
    Can I walk you home?

    I've even had some pretty unususl lines, such as: -
    Can I try your top on?
    If we dance, can I grab your ass?
    You have a very symetrical face!

    And how can I forget such poor attempts like: -
    You have great jugs!
    You seem really nice!

    I ask because I recieved the most horendously bad line this weekend. I was subtley trying to get rid of this guy because I really wasn't interested, so I told him all of the bad things about me. (He was basically trying to get me to go home with him) So I say "Oh I need a really good wax" (who like's hairy women I was thinking) This was the responce I recieved, "Oh i'll use my teeth and bite it all off", this then was proceeded by several munching sounds and a yum, yum, yum, yum! I couldn't say anything after this and just stared in dis-belief.

    Come on guys, what's going on in those heads of yours? I can laugh at it but good lord! I also want to hear any other bad chat up lines.

    XX
     
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  2. Nybarius Ennui Bores Me

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    I think you're making all of this up to gain NF popularity.

    Nobody chats you up, admit it.
     
  3. Shishou Under this eyepatch is an eye!

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    Ya know they call me Moses. Drop your pants, and I'll show you how I parted the Red Sea.
     
  4. Nybarius Ennui Bores Me

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    Tastiest time of the month, eh?
     
  5. Shishou Under this eyepatch is an eye!

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    You've made me realize how sick that is. Now I'm sayd.
     
  6. Nybarius Ennui Bores Me

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    Hint: Moses didn't use his tongue to part the red sea.

    Venture Brothers: "One woman servicing all those guys? She'd be in estrous all the time! I'm telling you, Smurfs aren't mammals!"
     
  7. Raistlin-sama Have you been naughty or nice?

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    Well, who cares?

    Small-talk is boring as hell anyways, and not something I usually feel the need to engage in.

    As for the content of your post, well I have never used any pick-up line, and have no valid opinion about it.
     
  8. Jackal Iscariot Ero-sennin

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  9. Bubbles now with 25% extra air

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    I only wish I was making it up but think about it how could anyone come up with that?

    XX
     
  10. sonnie_skies Braving the Rain

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    ...well. after reading posts 2-6, I've concluded that men are stupid ...okay, men are stupid.

    seriously, though, guys don't think before they talk. they just think if they impress a girl things will end up with them having sex. i mean, i've heard some dumb lines myself and it's made me realize that they really have no idea what they sound like.
     
  11. Nybarius Ennui Bores Me

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    How's this for a pickup line:

    "You look like a lonely anime nerd who's liable to pass on any offers she gets from perfectly fine gentleman, go and laugh about them online, and spend the rest of her life alone and miserable, all the while wondering why"?

    By the way, my favorite pickup line is "Hi"
     
  12. Bubbles now with 25% extra air

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    I'm not saying it bothers me, i'm mearly asking why are they so bad? With out chat up lines life would be a little more dull.

    XX
     
  13. Nybarius Ennui Bores Me

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    By the way, let me explain why my reaction to this thread is so hostile.

    This thread is little more than an excuse to bash men. And, most likely, it's stuff you're just making up for attention. Even if it were true (I have my doubts), it's still no excuse for sexism.
     
  14. x_Zen_x Sky

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    I heard that.
    Well what do you want guys to say ? hey lets have sex? you gotta start from stage 1 pshhh.
     
  15. CrazyMoronX Old Man

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    Similar thing happened to me at church a couple weeks back. A girl came up to me and say "Hi how you doin?" and after I said "good, how are you?" and walked away, I was like "what kind of pickup line was that?!?"

    She was relatively attractive, but still... Women suck at pick up... err chat up lines.
     
  16. Nybarius Ennui Bores Me

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    Yeah, one time, after I took this girl's virginity, she was all trying to snuggle with me and shit. What a loser!
     
  17. Jackal Iscariot Ero-sennin

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    I would have bitch-slaped her if I was you. :oh
    Spoiler: .
    ps: Oh comon, Im Jackal ffs.. I'm a natural born uke. FUCK YOU if ya believed me XD
     
  18. Nybarius Ennui Bores Me

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    I ended up locking her in an abandoned outdoor oven and moseying off :0
     
  19. Hef Night Work

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    You didn't stun her and tie her naked into a tree? :-(

    WHY NOT? :crying
     
  20. xeleron Gandulf the grey

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    I always start my conversation with: "Hey, whats happening, wazup.. etc ete.." :p Hopefully, that he/she will tell me what has been going on recently in their lifes.

    Or maybe:
    "Hey babe, I am going to protect you for life!" :wink GAIII SEN SEIIIIII
     
    Last edited: Dec 5, 2005
  21. Danchou Antagonist

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    I never use pick up lines, but hell i never pick any one up either.
     
  22. Zhongda Active Member

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    XD

    in the words of the gr8 moe:
    that was pawnage in it's most powerfull form

    *reps*

    Edit
    ..on second thought.. that wasn't really that funny :oh.. i should go sleep xS
     
  23. rimpelcut You know it, I know it.

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    why are girls so bad at sedusing these days...
     
  24. Jedi Mind Tricks <font face='Palatino Linotype, Arial'><font size='

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    Oh elementary my dear ?bubblishous?. You see, the men that ask you out are desperate and can?t get any ?action? from an attractive member of the opposite sex. So they basically go for the next best thing, you.

    I'll describe the intriguing process to you.
    You see, as these desperate men approach the wilder beast (you), despite the need for pleasure; they subconsciously avoid getting intimate with you by saying vulgar comments, such as the hair one you mentioned.
    It?s a defence mechanism for humans to avoid breeding with beasts.

    Evolution they call it.
     
  25. RAGING BONER Sexual Tyrannosaurus

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    for fucks sake! half way through the thread and i'm thinking were talking about some kind of phone sex hotline that horny perverted losers use to awkwardly interact with one another.

    its called a PICK-UP LINE!!!!!!! damn brits.

    *ahem*

    that slight annoyance aside...i usually don't have to use ridiculous lies or fake ass declarations of a womans beauty to pick up a chik (although i prefer to lie, must be genetically incoded into male DNA) since i can usually spot right away which ones are interested and which ones aren't. all in all, i much prefer when they approach me because it saves me a HELL OF A LOT of time. when you are appoached you don't really have to bother to get to know each other too well...as opposed to you doing the "pick-up" were you have to sit and talk shit with a person your not really interested in talking too, just screwing for a while and never seeing again.

    sometimes if i'm bored at a party however, i will choose to annoy the hell out of a woman until she breaks down and gives me her number...then i just blow my nose with it or something.

    yes i'm strange and i have a cruel streak.
     
  26. Dionysus Brandy and Death

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    There was a time when people had conversations, and, if they liked eachother, they'd spend more time together. What is it you are expecting, exactly? Perhaps you can be a part of the solution.
     
  27. RAGING BONER Sexual Tyrannosaurus

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    i'm thinking we set back the clock to even MORE traditional times...

    We club the bitch we like and drag her by the hair back to our love cave. when we tire of them we burn them at the stake.
     
  28. sasuke_limays I want to be HOKAGE!!!!!

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    haiya....why hah....
    all of you wnt to blame the mens....
     
  29. DragonHeart52 Cooler by the Lake

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    This whole topic of pick-up lines has been done to death before and personally, I find the idea of making fun of people who are just trying to break the ice a bit on the egotistical side. Why not give us a few examples of lines that you would use to impress a guy and let the men of NF rate your skills at engaging the opposite sex?

    As far as the "hairy in need of a waxing exchange", you asked for that one. If you don't like being treated like a piece of meat, stay out of the marketplace. Otherwise, don't complain and demean someone because they aren't up to your standards. It's a risk you run in the places you frequent.

    :oh I trust your insight, oh great one.
     
  30. Bubbles now with 25% extra air

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    Man, what an ear pounding i've got for this thread. I thought it'd be a laugh but hey obviously not. I can't be arsed!

    XX
     
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